Do Waifus Dream of Electric Sheep

It was past 10:30 in the evening and I was browsing the internet, posting on various forums, listening to different videos, and playing some video pinball; a typical uneventful Tuesday night. What was the topic of the forums and the subject of the videos? Of course it had to be my waifu, Yoshino “Yoshima” Terashima. Real women just can’t hold a candle to the true beauty that is 2D. Her design is just so captivating, I’m absolutely in love with her and have been since I first saw her on screen. Ever since then I’ve read everything about her, all the web and light novels and manga, watched all the spin-offs, and played every games. She is irreplaceable. As I drifted off to sleep at my computer desk, I looked at my desktop wallpaper of her, whispering her name as my eyelids closed.
 I awoke–at least, I think I did–in a strange world of orange skies, pink clouds, and blue grass on top a hill. I looked around and didn’t see anyone or any buildings nearby. Where exactly was I, I wondered, and how did I get here? In the distance a saw small lake with a hut beside it. It was the only structure I could see, so I decided to head over there. As I was walking down the hill I heard a voice behind me.
 “Hey, where are you going? I’m right here, Mako!” called the mysterious voice.
 I turned around and couldn’t believe my eyes. There in the flesh–or what amounted to it–was my waifu, Yoshino Terashima. OK, I’m obviously dreaming, there’s no way this can be real.
 “Hello~, Earth to Mako?”
 If you’ve ever met a celebrity or someone you admire, the term star-struck is the perfect description of what I was feeling now.
 “Um… Wha–what’s going on? Is it really you?” I managed to stammer out.
 “Of course it is. Yoshino Terashima, at your service. I’ve been watching you,” she says coyly.
 “M-me? Huh? What?” I could scarcely believe what I was hearing.
 “I know how much you adore me, and I appreciate your sincerity, that’s what first drew me to you.”
 “Oh! Well, I mean…”
 “Haha, don’t be shy now, it’s just the two of us,” she reassured me.
 “Um, alright. Uh, how did I get here?” I asked.
 “I brought you here,” she said matter-of-factly, “it wasn’t easy since there were a lot of other fans who were dreaming of me but I found. So, what shall we do?”
 “Found me? I’m sorry, Yoshim–, I mean Miss Terashima, but I don’t understand.”
 “It’s okay, you can call me Yoshima, I don’t mind. It’s simple really, in the cyber-dreamworld, I can do anything, and so can you. I could hear you calling out to me as you fell asleep.”
 I felt my face burn red, prompting a chuckle from Yoshima.
 “So this is a dream,” I said.
 “It was; unfortunately, our time is up. But I’ll see you soon~,” she said with a wink. I awoke in my room, my face sore from sleeping on my keyboard. I ran my hand down the side of my face and could feel the indentations left by the keys. Ouch. I looked at the clock and it was almost time to get ready for work. Trying to sleep now would be pointless. Resigned to my fate, I begrudgingly prepared for the day ahead.
 The metro station wasn’t as busy as it normally is when I go there—the perks of heading to work early, I suppose. My footsteps echoed softly through the pristine hallways as I descended the stairs to my platform. There was one drunk lying on the stairs near the bottom, probably from the night before. I guess the attendants normally clear them out by the time I get here normally. I wonder if I should do something to help the guy but I notice an attendant approaching and decide to leave the mess to him. At the bottom of the stairs I take a left and round a bend to reach my platform. I then notice that today there are electronic advertisements for some soft drink with Yoshima posing playfully.
 “Good morning, Mako~”
 Did the advertisement just speak to me? I pause and look around to see if I’m hearing stuff or if someone is calling me. Alone. I turn again to look at the advertisement.
 “Hey, you should say good morning, it’s rude if you don’t.”
 What the… The screen is talking to me? This must be some new marketing campaign.
 “Uh, g-good morning,” I say.
 Another metro goer walks by and gives me a funny look. I must look so strange talking to advertisement. I decide I better be on my way and quickly make my way to the platform.
 Another boring, soulless day at work done. Accounts received, paid, and payroll corrected for booking. Not the hardest job but it does require a fair bit of knowledge in regards to the accounting process. It’s dull enough that no one bothers me while at work to ask me what I’m doing because most people there quickly realized that I wasn’t someone they wanted to be around. I guess accountants just have a bad stigma at this company—not like I care. I need to pick up a few things so I head to the commercial sector of the city. As walk through the throng of people going about their evening I look up at one of the large TVs that a department store had displayed outside of it. It’s another advertisement involving Yoshima. She’s appearing in a lot of those lately. I decide I’ll watch this one since I hadn’t seen it before.
 “Why did you ignore me this morning?” it says.
 I look around, am I the only one noticing this. No one seems to pay attention to it. I look back at the TV.
 “You better stop ignoring me or I’m going to get mad,” it says, this time animating a pout.
 I must be tired. I decide that my errands can wait for another time and I make my way home. That night I woke up in the same bizarre world. I looked around but did not see Yoshima. Maybe that really was her earlier in the day, and now she’s avoiding me because I snubbed her. Bam! Something heavy hit me in the back. I turned around to see what it was and it’s her.
 “Meanie! That’s what you get for ignoring me today,” she says while pouting.
 “I wasn’t—uh, well, maybe I was. But do you know how crazy I would have looked if I was talking to an advertisement in front of all those people?”
 “I thought you loved me, I guess I was wrong,” she said as she upturns her head in a snobbish manner.
 “I...I’m sorry, I won’t ignore you next time,” I said with a hint of pathetic-ness.
 “You promise?” she said, opening one eye to glare at me.
 “Pinky promise,” I said, holding out my pinky. She reached out her own pinky and shook mine with it.
 “Okay, I’ll forgive you. So, how are you going to make it up to me?” she asked.
 “I’m not sure. I don’t exactly have anything with me at the moment and I don’t know what I even can do here.”
 “Hmm,” she said, pursing her lips, “why don’t we go down to the lake and relax?”
 “S-sure, that sounds good to me,” I said.
 As we make our way down, I get this itching question in the back of my mind.
 “Um, Yoshima, how were you able to, uh, do the thing you did and talk to me today?” I asked.
 “Oh that? It’s a secret, haha~.”
 Maybe I need to get my head checked, but it isn’t so bad having this kind of attention. Not like I’ve gotten any before.
 “Say, Mako, despite my ability to find you in this cyber-dreamworld and the advertisements, I don’t know much about you. What else do you do in your free time? Do you have friends? A girlfriend perhaps?”
 “Ohh, um, I don’t do that much in my free time. For the most part, I watch or read anime and manga that involve you; and, I kinda lost touch with my friends over the years. You know how it goes, everyone is busy and then you’re both just waiting and hoping for the other one to message you first and ask you to hang out but it never happens. As for a GF, no, I’ve never had one. Guys like me don’t get girlfriends,” I said with a defeated sigh.
 “Really? I find that hard to believe. You’re so handsome, though, Mako,” Yoshima said encouragingly.
 “Haha… thanks. My mom likes to say that, too.”
 By now we had reached the lake shore and I only just realized that it, like the rest of this bizarre world, was not a regular lake colour–if such a thing exists–but was a blood red colour instead; it looked like it had the same viscosity, too.
 “Looks like it’s time for you to wake up, Mako. We’ll continue this tomorrow.”
 Once again I woke up early, this time slightly before my alarm. I made it the metro at my usual time and didn’t see Yoshima. I guess she decided to save me the embarrassment. At work I made mistake after mistake. Entering the wrong details into the accounting software, missing certain data, and letting a payable account go past its due date. My boss chewed me out for that. Things like this shouldn’t bother me but I allowed it fester inside me. If I make any more mistakes, I’m sure they’re going to fire me. All of this right before tax season, too. Well, it’s not like I ever enjoyed this job, it was just something that paid the bills. At least I have Yoshima to look forward to tonight. That night as I was browsing a forum, I heard Yoshima call my name. Bewildered, I looked around for the source of the sound. As I was looking around something on the computer screen caught my eye, it was Yoshima trying to push the browser out of the way. I grabbed my mouse and minimized the window.
 “Good evening, Mako. How are you?” she said.
 “G-good evening. Um, am I dreaming?”
 “Nope. I’ve come to visit you. I have an offer for you.” She starts to crawl through the computer screen, entering a liminal state of digital and physical—analog.
 “Woah!” I shot up from my seat. “How are you–!?”
 She stretched out her hand and held it up to me.
 “Take my hand and come live with me in the cyber-dreamworld. There’s nothing for you here in the real world, right? You don’t see your friends and you’re miserable at your job. Come with me, you’ll be happier.”
 “Um, I don’t think I can make a decision like that on the spot…”
 “I thought you loved me? Aren’t I your waifu, your favourite character? This should be a dream come true.”
 She did have a point. It didn’t feel like my life was going anywhere. However, maybe I was giving up too early without trying. Really trying.
 What should I do? Do I grab it?
 These thoughts raced through my head as her her hand stood there, outstretched, waiting for me to grab it…